I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
my sisters under your porch take her home
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Randomize