so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
