So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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