Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize