this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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