Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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