Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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