I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
