i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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