I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
