I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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