SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize
