But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
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