Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Randomize
