you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
