The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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