oh god the rape fog is back!
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
