pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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