he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
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