she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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