love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
