I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
