Pregnant stripper...not hot.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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