I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
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