i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
