you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Randomize
