Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize