Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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