It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
