Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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