I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
