i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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