Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
