I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
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