just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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