Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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