Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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