I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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