his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
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