whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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