i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
The air was thick with penises
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize