so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
