"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
40s are totally the cure
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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