yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize