I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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