i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
