Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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