Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?