i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
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bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
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I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
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