i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
